It’s a little horrible when the thing your subconscious mind most looks forward to is that extra-salty Chex Mix that falls to the bottom of the bag. And the drink of water after it.
Hair/voice/sunglasses/name/you’re perfect. but surprisingly aged.
HEARING: Lua by Bright Eyes
FEELING: heavy blanket on my legs, chapped lips, cold hands, calm/invigorated.
SEEING: painting supplies/medicine/nat’l geographic/In Cold Blood/etc. strewn over the coffee table
WANTING: to nap with someone, to take pictures, to sing along to my music, to take a walk down the street in my bare bare feet, to see my developed pictures from Talahassee.
WEARING: Paris t-shirt from less than or equal to 6 yrs ago
What I Like from Prada Men Fall 2010
Details of note: Double collars, interesting colors, knits reminiscent of Missoni (especially the dark pink/seafoam colored sweaters), warm-colored print on men’s trench reminiscent of Prada [women’s] Resort 2010, interesting bags, tied sweaters reminiscent of Dries Van Noten [men’s] Spring 2010, cool shoes for both men & women.
I’ve been thinking about what to do in the future.
All I wanna do is run around barefoot with my friends. Work in air-conditioned buildings sometimes, designing important things. Keep working & playing separate, but still love working. Work alone & contribute my ideas to group efforts. Work with people who are good at science & are good at math & can teach me things. Plant flowers & give people flowers & bake & send pies and cakes as birthday cards.
I want to own boats or have access to boats. I want to live near the water and wear predominantly white with splashes of blue, red, turquoise, gold, pink, and purple. I won’t wear orange. I don’t really like orange. I’ll have leather boots & leather sandals, & I’ll have pretty shoes for going to the office and going out.
But I’ll also live in a city or near a city. I don’t want to live in the woods, & I don’t want to be secluded, and I don’t want to miss people. I like people.
I’ve always wanted a pair of pink shoes. Deep, rosy pink, satin flats with a big clear crystal on the front edged in gold scalloping. If I had a pair of shoes like this, I would be able to fly. I would want nothing ever again except some white accordion-pleated skirts to wear them with.
I’ll paint with oils. I love oils, & I love the smell of turpentine.
The photos are by: Todd Selby, Ryan Mcginley.
LISTENING TO: Kiki’s Delivery Service soundtrack
& my messy room.
THINKING ABOUT: school tomorrow & my messy room.
FEELING: tired & watery-eyed, but otherwise decent.
WEARING: big blue stripy tshirt with a pocket on the chest, little rosy pink cardigan, woolly grey tights, cuffed denim shorts, my tortoise-shell hornrimmed glasses.
NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS:
I’m writing these down as many places as possible so that I keep them keep them keep them.
(Repeating things 3 times makes me feel like I’m in Eloise, which is comforting because everyone in that book totally has their shit together… well in the way that matters. El & her nanny have got strongly established self-identities I guess.)
1. care for my friends outwardly. (show that I care about them, I guess. I can’t find a good way to word this. show my caringness for my friends. blehdebleh)
2. ask for help. (lack of this is the only reason for any of my failures.)
3. develop regular sleep patterns. (mainly during the rest of the school year. for the time being I’ll choose to ignore the fact that it’s 1:16 already)
4. Do yoga & stretch more.
5. Refine wardrobe (so that when I wake up 10 mins. before school begins I can still look fre$$h!)
6. Go to architecture camp! (possible places to apply: carnegie mellon, cornell, upenn…um.)
7. Find a new piano teacher.
8. Decorate house. (I’ve actually already somewhat started this/I have many ideas.)
9. Take ballroom dancing lessons!
10. Learn to cook. (I might be most excited about this one. Plus for the first time in a year, I now have an oven!)
11. Learn to do a handstand. (Because I know this will make me feel powerful and happy.)
12. Be a good girlfriend..
13. Make a shitton of art, & document everything.
14. Explore/become more familiar/develop routines in my hometown.
(Because of the following horoscope via Rob Brezny…)
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You Sagittarians may wander farther and
wider than the other signs of the zodiac, and you may get itchier when
required to stay in one place too long, but you still need a sense of
belonging. Whether that comes from having a certain building where you
feel comfortable or a wilderness that evokes your beloved
adventurousness or a tribe that gives you a sense of community, you
thrive when you’re in regular touch with a homing signal that keeps you
grounded. According to my analysis, 2010 will be prime time for you to
find or create or renew your connection to a source that serves this
It actually makes a lot of sense to establish a strong home base this year, since in the last quarter of it I’ll be going away (hopefully somewhat far away!) to school. God, I love being a Saggitarius. Is that strange?
SOME MUSIC THAT I LISTENED TO IN 2009:
Lolita – Throw Me the Statue
My favorite song from the Urban Outfitters LSTN #1
I’m So Paid – Akon ft. Young Jeezy & Lil Wayne
Driving to the State football game with Andrea, Daniel, Marlene, and Nitesh. We really did go 90 in a 65. Then Andrea almost ran the car into a flatbed truck.
Also got me through a rough few days in Illinois in December
The BQE – Sufjan Stevens
After my brother showed it to me, I couldn’t stop listening. The piano in Mvmt. 1 especially.
Daylight – Matt & Kim
I listened to this at night time [oddly enough] & walking to school in the morning. Got it from Robert Peng
First Love – Uffie
lol Uffie… I don’t know.
Up, Up, & Away – Kid Cudi
Andrea sang this song all the time after the album came out, and I’d never actually heard it. We were driving back from Garba with Nitesh and when he played it, I thought it was the most wonderful thing I’d ever heard.
[Fljotavik, Glosoli, Inni mer syngur vitleysyngur, Agaetis Byrjun] – Sigur Ros
Daniel and I are getting married when he becomes president of the world so that I can be first lady. And because he’s awesome. He introduced me to Sigur Ros, and one night I looked up the English translation of Agaetis Byrjun. The next day at school I excitedly approached him and said, “Daniel, I have the perfect song to play at our wedding. Well, you know that song Agetis Byrjun by Sigur Ros?” and he finished, “because it means a pretty good start! That’s perfect. We’ll be married forever, Clare.”
Gone – Kanye West
I have memories of walking around the Munster debate tournament listening to this. I was doing Public Forum with Alisa, and I was nervous all day. I like the part where they say, “puff puff pass.”
I love listening to him play the violin. There were a few days when I stayed in my bedroom and blared Itzhak for hours.
Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head
Shriya and I saw them open for Lily Allen in April at the Riviera in Chicago. Luke was so charming. We invented the fact that he smiled at each of us multiple times. Shaun looked kind of brooding and I was disappointed, but Luke’s adorable factor overwrote any negativity. Liam waved to us. Claire had perfect long hair.
Is who Shriya and I saw after NPSH. She was a perfect performer. I like It’s Not Me, It’s You quite a bit.
Mushaboom – Feist
By far my favorite song in 2009. It’s perfect. (But I listened to a lot of Feist in general). When I was watching 500 Days of Summer and it started playing.. I had one of those moments of overpowering glee.
[First Day of My Life, Mushaboom,
[Someday, 12:51, Soma] – The Strokes
I’ve liked them since before 2009 I think, but these are a few of my favorite songs by The Strokes and are good for studying.
[Man on the Moon, Soundtrack 2 My Life] – Kid Cudi
The Blueprint 3 – Jay-z
My favorite rapper of all time.
By Your Side – Cocorosie
This song is a bit weird, as are Cocorosie, but I remember listening to it a lot this year.
Green Eyes – Coldplay
Once I had a talk about Coldplay with Nitesh, and how we both always forget how much we love them. Mainly this song and the other oldish stuff.
Chicken Pox – I’m From Barcelona
Nitesh got really upset with me when I was in Michigan and he was at NASA camp this summer, and I felt like my stomach was going to shrivel up and I was going to die. I listened to this song all day.
December 4th – Jay-z
This song is good for pumping-up, and a bit too good at night because it makes me restless and like I want to jump around.
I Poke Her Face – Kid Cudi
It’s funny, and it reminds me of a time David, Ben, Marlene, and I went to Wendy’s for frosties. Then they drove us by a weird house that they thought was haunted and we laughed at them.
I’m a Flirt – BowWow ft. R. Kelly
I rediscovered this song (& Bow Wow for that matter), and got caught up in it so fast.
You Can Get it All – BowWow
Sean showed this song to me one night while I was doing my homework, and I played the youtube video over & over.
My Boo – Usher
One day, Nitesh & I were driving to lunch, & this came on the radio. We looked at each other and grinned, and then he started singing to me.
I Know – Jay-z
Another favorite by the wonderful man.
Dance Dance Dance – Lykke Li
Shriya & I saw her at Lollapalooza
I Love My Car – Belle & Sebastian
Sincerely Jane – Janelle Monae
Lang – Haruka Nakamura
Every Girl – Young Money
Medication, Pavanorama – Deviations Project
What You Want – The Roots
An Eluardian Instance – Of Montreal
Ready or Not – The Fugees
Little Garcon – Born Ruffians
I’ve Got Your Number, Sleepyhead – Passion Pit
Det Snurrar i Min Skalle – Familjen
West Coast – Coconut Records
Black Panther – Crystal Castles
Digital Suicide – Hearts Revolution
Alohamora – Pogo
Mr. Yeah – The Dream
W.A.L.E.D.A.N.C.E. – Wale
I’ll Be in the Sky – B.O.B.
Father & Mother, Pas si Simple, La Dispute – Yann Tiersen
911, Sweetest Girl – Wyclef Jean
Music is My Hot Hot Sex – CSS
Open House – Bombay Bicycle Club
On Top of The World, What You Know – T.I.
I Want You to DANCE – ComaR
Young Sensualists – Throw Me The Statue
Little Things – Pomplamoose
Lost One – Jay-z
Top candidate for favorite rap song this year
King Without a Crown – Matisyahu
International Affair – Mark Ronson
No Woman No Cry – Bob Marley
The Prayer – Kid Cudi
Fahrenheit Fair Enough – Telefon Tel Aviv
Diamond Dave – The Bird and the Bee
Four Winds – Bright Eyes
We Are Your Friends – Justice vs. Simian
After Hours – The Velvet Underground
Sound in a dark room – Telefon Tel Aviv
Nord – Haruka Nakamura
Parentheses – The Blow
Minor Swing – Django Reinhardt
The Lost Art of Murder – Babyshambles
Artichokes – Maps & Atlases
Fleur de Saison – Emilie Simon
The Love Cats – The Cure
Catherine the Waitress – Teitur
Protons, Neutrons, Electrons – The Cat Empire
Little Bit – Lykke Li
Sheila – Jamie T
Three Little Words – Frankmusik