TODAY: Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Dresden Dolls, The Blow, Final Fantasy, anticipation, I want to scream, symphony rehearsal later, impatience, piano playing, criticism criticism criticism, rainy, caffeine, headaches, caffeiiiine, shaky shaky shaky hands, bad piano playing, loud piano playing, vibrating telephone, I LOVE YOU.
I stillllll want to scream. Wow. Disappointment. This is not a real post. I love kid cudi too much.
I’m smarter than a chair. I also love to walk at night, & I have exaggerated emotions and way too much love for everything. And I’m not even overly joyful.
OH. Yesterday I made friendship progress. I’m excited for senior year. I’ll hang out with them all the time. They’re all so cute. Especially John. Mom, do you need anything from the grocery store? I have to stay here. I’m playing a game. My teammates need me. Seventh grade. My favorite thing to do is make dinner with my mom. Video games video games I love to play video games with boys. I get shotttt shottt.shott up the block. Day & nite.
Right now, I want to live in a house made out of plants, a house made out of glass, or a house made out of glass and filled with plants. Ladybugs and fireflies would flit around, the air would be cool and moist, and I’d wear countless pale pink tshirt dresses and my favorite blue kimono, along with pretty socks of all varieties, all of them different shades of grey.
My own private greenhouse. Speakers would be hidden in the plants so I could listen to telafon tel aviv constantly, and Debussy or Chopin when I got bored. A select few other songs would be allowed, but it’d be a very carefully edited playlist. My hair would be short, but not too short. The humidity would make it poufy and curly, and I’d laugh upon seeing my reflection in the glass of the walls, at the beauty mark created on my face by a ladybug resting. I could scream whenever I wanted to. There would be windows I could open, even though everything would be made of glass. It would rain a lot, but it would also be sunny a lot. I would never have the desire to leave. People would visit me when I wanted them to. I’d see curly hair every once in awhile. Those would be the good days. Sometimes glasses would come for a day or two and we would lie on the floor and make art and take pictures. I don’t know if anyone else would come, but maybe tshirt and maybe paper skirt. I don’t know what to think about paper skirt. Well, I can think a lot, but I don’t know how to feel about her. Would I need anyone else? I’d like to see long hair and short hair and I don’t even know them. All I want to do with everyone else is say hello every so often. They don’t need to stay, it would make me feel lonely. Oh, and there would be clotheslines. I love clotheslines. I’d hand wash all my clothes in a metal bathtub. My toothbrush would be white porcelain. Everything white porcelain, plants, metal, and glass.
Sometimes I don’t like my face.
…but hair can make a very good mask
& someday, I will get a very good camera.
Sunday Sunday Sunday the end.
I love the radio. I love the radio because it’s soothing, because it decreases loneliness, because it’s a bit old-fashioned and because it allows one to occasionally stumble apon an experience so delightful it stays with you for weeks.
Two programs have become ones that I cannot live without, and both of them I found on WNYC.org: Radiolab & Spinning on Air, the latter being a music program. And from these two programs have come two specific episodes that are completely enchanting, and at times, a little haunting…
The first, from radiolab, begins with the faint sounds of ghostly music. “We begin in Thailand, watching fireflies glow in glorious synchrony, lighting up miles of mangrove trees like Christmas trees…” The rest of the program explores the ways of fireflies, ants, etc. and how they have such order and civilization without any specific leader. Along with being very intriguing, the beautiful aesthetic qualities are reason enough to listen.
The second is about 1950s singer/songwriter Connie Converse, who is not only appealing and intriguing because of her thoughtful & witty lyrics but also because “…in 1974 she wrote a series of farewell letters to her friends and family, packed up her Volkswagen Bug and disappeared. She has not been heard from since.”
photos by lina scheynius, who I like.
THINGS I LIKE TO DO LATELY:
listen to Bright Eyes. take naps. play piano. draw on my hands & arms. draw on other things. paint on my walls (they’re being repainted soon anyway…). read The Grapes of Wrath. learn about Judaism. listen to Crystal Castles. write music for percussion class. dream about the summertime. watch this over and over: